Sunday, March 25, 2007

Not yet....Wait....Wait...




Rec'd the packet from Monique on Monday? or Tuesday? and I read through it right away. Have yet to initial all the blanks.

Mark has not even read through the documents at all yet. Sigh.

What are we waiting for, God?

I hope that we can sign and notarize this SOON.

I am ready! Are you, God?

Friday, March 16, 2007

It's as though I have pee-ed on a stick....


and we are waiting to see if it turns PINK!



Rec'd the last call from Monique today, reporting that she has all of our information from all our physicians and counselors. Yeeha!

She will send out *today* the registration packet, which we will review and sign and return with a check for one thousand dollars.

We may receive it tomorrow!!! TOMORROW!!!

I am so excited!

Please, Lord, help Mark and I know how to fund this and help the financial discussions that *must* occur be easy and civil and practical and low-key, matter-of-fact.

I long to be excited, but still feel a bit guarded.

Help me to trust, Lord! Help Mark to trust, as well.

Why I love Salvation Army!

Shoes! Shoes on Sale.

Brand new. With Tags!!!


Each pair of shoes, each piece of clothing was ..... 25 cents!!

Can't wait to get to Vietnam! Thank you, Lord! Mwah!!!

Saturday, March 10, 2007

Prodigal Ponderings

For the first time, I am a prodigal. I have thought all along, since my conversion at age 30, that I was a prodigal. I felt like the younger brother; I had been living large, self-reliant, and before finally coming to my senses and returning home to my Father.

But, nooooooo. I was never a prodigal *before*, since I had never been a child of God, prior to that point. You can't leave a home, a family, a Father that you've never belonged to. You can't return, if you've never left.

But oh, how I left this past year. I left my Father's home, rolled around in my misery and confusion and ate a lot of slop, intended for hogs. I am now in the phase of coming to my senses and rehearsing my apology. Feeling really insecure and not at all worthy of being forgiven, loved, showered with acceptance.

I do not think that I have yet experienced the moment when "God Ran", as I have not yet taken my eyes totally off myself. I will have to look up, to catch my first glimpses of my Omnipotnet, All Powerful, Omnipresent, Holy Papa running to me. I will have to look up from my dusty sandals, quit rehearsing my excuses and defenses and process the sight of my God, running to me.

Running. To. Me.

We read of the older son's response to his Father's exhuberant welcome for his younger son...bitterness. This is the topic of many sermons, from many pastors' pulpits.

Are there any writings that project what the response of the younger son is to the Father's welcome? Is he sheepish? Relieved? Prideful? Defensive? Rejecting?

I have been all of these and more, I am afraid. I will find it difficult to simply accept the love, forgiveness and compassion from PapaGod. I hope He can forgive, even that.

"Fulfilled Today"

I almost cannot keep up with the miraculous doings of Jehovah Sneaky.

Rachel and Caleb arrived on Friday AM. Unbelievable! I have the photos to prove it, though.

It was (as the Lord correctly and gently reminded me) a fulfillment to the prayer I prayed so many times, I gave up praying it any more, believing that the answer was "no". Malachi 4:6--"Turn the hearts of the fathers toward the children and the hearts of the children to the fathers".

As I sat weeping in church, at Lynn and Darrin's wedding, overcome by His goodness in soooo many areas of my life, in so many areas of soooo many lives, He reminded me of my prayer of old and of the fact that Rachel and Caleb were in our home and He said quietly, "Fulfilled today".

He also said that same statement about the wedding/marriage verse He gave me years ago in Deuteronomy Chapter 8--"Fulfilled today", He said simply (and truthfully!).

I am humbled, amazed and most often (and unusually), speechless over all of this. It is holy and unexpected and undeserved.

For the first time, I am a prodigal. I have thought all along, since my conversion at age 30, that I was a prodigal. I felt like the younger brother; I had been living large, self-reliant, and before finally coming to my senses and returning home to my Father.

But, nooooooo. I was never a prodigal *before*, since I had never been a child of God, prior to that point. You can't leave a home, a family, a Father that you've never belonged to. You can't return, if you've never left.

But oh, how I left this past year. I left my Father's home, rolled around in my misery and confusion and ate a lot of slop, intended for hogs. I am now in the phase of coming to my senses and rehearsing my apology. Feeling really insecure and not at all worthy of being forgiven, loved, showered with acceptance.

I do not think that I have yet experienced the moment when "God Ran", as I have not yet taken my eyes totally off myself. I will have to look up, to catch my first glimpses of my Omnipotnet, All Powerful, Omnipresent, Holy Papa running to me. I will have to look up from my dusty sandals, quit rehearsing my excuses and defenses and process the sight of my God, running to me.

Running. To. Me.

We read of the older son's response to his Father's exhuberant welcome for his younger son...bitterness. This is the topic of many sermons, from many pastors' pulpits.

Are there any writings that project what the response of the younger son is to the Father's welcome? Is he sheepish? Relieved? Prideful? Defensive? Rejecting?

I have been all of these and more, I am afraid. I will find it difficult to simply accept the love, forgiveness and compassion from PapaGod. I hope He can forgive, even that.

Thursday, March 1, 2007

Gift of Love






Well, the first step is official.

We have completed paperwork to apply to adopt with Gift of Love International and their Viet Nam program.

We met with Monique Zhao in DSM on Friday and she spent two hours with us answering our questions, showing us her recent photos from the first adoption trip to VN and giving us help with our initial paperwork.

After that, Mark and I went to Macaroni Grill to celebrate! We had a lovely meal and brought home many leftovers. Yum!

We had planned on spending the night in DSM, shopping and going to the state wrestling meet, but my back was hurting so badly that Mark and I just headed back home. We barely made it home before the worst ice storm in years hit.

Picked up the dog from the daycare/spa and went home.

Saturday, we lost power for 6 hours, just at the time we wanted to watch the state meet finals. Sooo...we went over to Mark's mom and dad's to watch. Thanks!! BJ Brooks finished second; Mike Jones, 5th and Nick Sands???

When we arrived home the power was back on (thank you, Lord). We watched the movie "The Prestige" and then, as with all "thinking movies", I had to jump onto some discussion boards and read what others were thinking, as I obsessed about plot's twists.

Alannah and Jared were with their dad in DSM and instead of coming home, were stranded for another night (they had been there since Wednesday). They were able to caravan home on Sunday, leaving around noon.

So, here are some photos to help document our journey to our Vietnamese daughter.

Mark and I in front of Gift of Love...our appetizer at Macaroni Grill...our paperwork ready to be sent...the Independence Postal Office...my cheesy-happy face, as I drove home from work that day!